As I’m sure you’ve heard, North Carolina wants Disney! Michael Garrett Democrat from Guilford County, has filed Senate Bill 594, the “Mickey’s Freedom Restoration Act,” to give Disney a place to move the Walt Disney World Resort. As someone born and raised in Guilford County I wholeheartedly support this idea.
We are perfect for Walt Disney World. We’ve got plenty of space. Despite having 3 major metropolitan areas within 20 minutes of each other there is still lots of room to expand. Nearby Stokes County is largely undeveloped and as a current resident here I say that I for one will happily relocate in order for Disney to have the space it needs. Walt Disney World is 43 square miles. Stokes County is 456 square miles so the room is there.
We also have an international airport. Except we are Greensboro North Carolina so who actually flies into it? No one. That’s who. That makes this area even more perfect. Our airport won’t be as crowded since Disney traffic will be the only traffic going in or out. Goodbye, 2 hour lines for TSA! Hello, less stress on vacation!
Our temperatures are also ideal. Sure, it’s not Florida weather but hey, it doesn’t rain every day so you’ll save money on ponchos! OK fine, we get some snow but so does Disneyland Paris and they do just fine. Besides, we only really get one good snow a year, that’s fewer hurricanes than Orlando gets, I’m just saying.
North Carolina is perfect geographically too! We are halfway down the coast making it a shorter trip for Northerners who visit Disney in droves. In case any local Floridians need convincing to give up the Mouse House, no one else will ever move into your neighborhood from “up North” just to be closer to Disney! In fact, I think it’s a safe bet to say a lot of current transplants will move. We Disney adults are a fickle bunch.
The Tarheel State is ready to welcome Disney with open arms. We’ve got a Democrat Governor and a Republican legislature so this whole “war with Disney” and the government getting involved nonsense would come to an end because that’s how checks and bounderies work. One would cancel out the other. Sure, that means nothing ever really gets done here but that’s another reason why Disney is perfect here: They’d have free reign. Our legislative branches are be too busy fussing to care what Disney does.
I can hear you thinking dear reader and the answer is no, I don’t really think this will happen. Neither does Representative Michael Garrett. Bills like “Mickey’s Freedom Restoration Act” are never intended to pass. They are simply introduced into public record in order to make a statement. In this case, Rep. Garrett wanted to make a statement that he feels things in Florida have gone seriously awry.